Wow...Thank you, Melissa, for bringing this up. I want to link to this blog and then I'll go on with what I have to say. Yes...there's a lot of reading here for anyone actually intrested.
So now for me. Yes, I heard some of those comments and I like to try to extend grace to those who don't know better. It makes me feel so much better to read where Nancy said, " We’re so unclear on what we actually believe about that child, that we’re uncomfortable with the grief associated with losing him or her." I have struggled with the same thing and they were MY babies. Yes, I said "they." We've had 2 losses. One right before we got pregnant with Violet and this latest one. The earlier one was "easier" I can say 3 years later because we got pregnant with Violet so soon afterward. In my head I justify it as "well...we wouldn't have had Violet." But this one...oh, this one...
Allan's analysis came back clear. Which means no more babies for us. There will be no child to cover over the grief of losing this one. That doesn't mean God isn't turning these ashes into beauty...I believe He is already showing me how He's making this tragedy into something amazing, but it does mean I don't know this grief, I've never experienced it before and it HURTS.
I mentioned to Allan last night how no one has commented on my last blog post. I don't know why that is. I know people have read it. It's okay, maybe I'm frying your grids. But I am grateful to know that it's okay to grieve and it's okay to expose things to people that may make them feel awkward. I'm grateful to have this place to share my experiences and to hopefully help others who have gone through/are going through the same things.
And that's it for me for now. This is very disconjointed and difficult to read, but there it is...my heart.